An elopement wedding is an intimate form of marriage and an original alternative to traditional weddings. It allows couples to break away from the beaten path and personalize their day freely. However, it’s not for everyone. Below, discover my tips for a successful elopement!
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What is an elopement?
A trend that originated in the United States several years ago, an elopement refers a romantic getaway… which is quite explicit.
By its etymology, elopement therefore involves fleeing (to elope) from your everyday life, from your family constraints. It’s a personal and individual step that involves – almost – only you and your future significant other.
Traditional wedding…
A traditional wedding is generally (except for Destination Weddings) local and convenient for guests in terms of travel. It can be formal or original but typically involves a large number of people. Festivities usually gather between thirty and three hundred people.
…or romantic getaway
An elopement wedding is timeless and out of the ordinary; it typically involves a location that is usually remote (e.g., a destination wedding abroad). It’s also highly personalized in terms of theme, informal, and original. Lastly, by definition, it’s an intimate and secret wedding.
Concretely, elopement goes against the ambiance and atmosphere of traditional weddings. It’s a bit of a mix between a destination wedding and an ultra-intimate and secret ceremony; thus, an elopement is a wedding with a very small group. Present are the newlyweds, their witnesses, the officiant, and optionally the photo/video team. And that’s it! It’s the pinnacle of intimate weddings.
Advantages of elopement vs. a traditional wedding
Advantage #1: The epitome of romance and intimacy
By definition, eloping has an ultra-romantic dimension. Its Romeo and Juliet aspect, with the transgression of conventions and customs, gives it a very special flavor. Moreover, formalizing your union in a dream location gives it a timeless dimension.
Advantage #2: Breaking away from the beaten path
This ceremony offers a lightness due to its extraordinary aspect and the absence of family pressure. It is particularly appreciated by ultra-original couples who can then give free rein to their imagination. Choosing an elopement wedding means transforming yourself into an artist for a day. Here, you can literally paint a day in your image… so choose a theme and go for it! Are you a rock couple? Go all out with your theme with rockabilly outfits, a vintage car, and « old school » rings. Are you passionate about role-playing games, cosplay, or the Lord of the Rings universe? Iceland opens its doors to you with its extraordinary landscapes!
Advantage #3: Minimizing family tensions
Are your parents separated and not on good terms? Have your two families never met, and you’re not sure they’ll get along? Minimizing tensions and friction between members of the two families can sometimes be a real headache. When eloping, all these fears disappear!
Advantage #4: Reducing your wedding budget
A traditional wedding typically costs around twenty thousand pounds on average and can rise to several tens of thousands of pounds. An all-inclusive elopement usually costs less than fifteen thousand pounds, even for the wildest destinations!
Note that I strongly recommend that future spouses not base their decision on the financial aspect when choosing an elopement or a traditional wedding. Even though this option will always be cheaper than a conventional wedding, we are still talking about an investment of several thousand pounds… if your budget doesn’t allow for a large-scale wedding but the social aspect is very important to you, try simply reducing the number of guests, choosing a more affordable location… basing your decision on a budgetary basis is just not a good idea; a wedding is above all a life project, not a financial transaction.
Advantage #5: Being free from the pressure of loved ones
One of the major concerns of future spouses when preparing for their wedding is to please every guest. However, satisfying everyone requires many concessions, which can sometimes give the impression of altering your project. Freed from these considerations, you can make your decisions freely.
Advantage #6: Choosing a dream destination
Choosing the destination of their dreams is undoubtedly one of the reasons for the enthusiasm for elopement. No longer having to move dozens/hundreds of guests, you can now choose the location of your choice. Your imagination is the only limit here! Iceland, Tahiti, the Canary Islands, Thailand, Las Vegas… everything becomes possible, even the craziest plans!
Depending on your preferences, it could be a natural setting (Norwegian fjords, Hawaiian volcanoes, Icelandic waterfalls, glaciers…) or, conversely, a major city (Paris, Brussels, Cologne, Amsterdam, the Alps, Venice, London). Many dream destinations are just a few hours away by plane!
Advantage #7: Reducing stress during preparations
Lightening the preparations is another reason for the success of this type of intimate wedding. Gone are the long months of preparation and organization: invitations, seating plans, coordination of different providers, decoration, meticulous planning, menu choices… with reduced preparation, you can make the wedding of your dreams a reality.
Note that in case of rescheduling/changing the date, elopement will be much easier to move. There are only a handful of providers to notify (photographer, videographer, hotel, airline).
Advantage #8: Not being the centre of attention of a big event
Getting married means that all eyes will be on you during this day. By extension, you will feel the need to ensure that each guest has a good time, to entertain them, and to show them your gratitude for their presence. This can be stressful or even anxiety-inducing for reserved and introverted people. If this is your case, an intimate wedding will probably allow you to enjoy the day more. By extension, future spouses often feel the need to take care of and entertain each guest, which can be stressful.
Disadvantages of elopement
A project that is difficult to explain to your family
If you decide to have an elopement wedding, expect a form of disappointment from your friends and family.
A risk of regret afterwards
Elopement is a real life project and a decision that must be carefully considered beforehand. Weigh the pros and cons before making a decision. The lack of social aspect is a negative point to consider as well. Making this choice by definition will distance you from your family, to whom you will have to recount this day later. Marriage is perceived as a great social moment, during which your loved ones and family come together to celebrate your union and your life together. You accept here to forgo all of that.
Some moments will just not happen
Also keep in mind that some symbolic moments will not take place: your preparation with your loved ones, the father of the bride accompanying her to the altar, the second dance with your parents